Me = Fail

Wow.  I am sorry.  2 Months since my last post.  And this one isn't even going to be a good one to make up for it.

FORGIVE ME!!

All in all, I think it is safe to say I have failed.  And I would like to put the blame of the fail to school.  Well, at least some of it.  I give up on life when I'm in school.


I don't take pictures anymore, I don't quilt,

I don't have a social life.

I just give up.  Well.  Mostly.  There is also the very undeniable fact that I am extremely lazy, and when I get my "free moments", I choose to play angry birds instead of being productive.

But now that school is over, I will hopefully WILL get off my lazy behind and get back to doing this, at least weekly, as well as my other hobbies. 

See you all next!



PS,
Thanks to all for the emails and comments I've been getting asking for me to come back.  It actually means a lot! You guys are the best!!

What the What??!?

Oh!  Hello!  It's been...a while.  Yea sorry about that. 

I think I legitimately broke my brain this past week with school and work.  I've kept on meaning to put a new post up but I've become a lazy "no brain working" zombie.  I couldn't remember any good stories from my childhood to share, and my week was exceptionally boring.  I even tried going through my idea note book, and things I once thought would be funny/interesting/something that wouldn't get rotten fruit chucked at me have all turned into boring/super boring/probably rotten fruit worthy things.

I tried drawing a picture to see if that would help my writers block funk.  And.....well, just look.

So this is going to be a ridiculously short post.  BUT!  Next one WILL be up soon and and be way better and longer and not drawn by a 3 year old me. 


Please don't leave me.....

Pet Peeves

Boy am I glad this day is finally over.  Some days I can handle the mundane pretty well, but not today.  It was almost like the whole universe ganged up on me and started acting in the exact fashion that would tick me off.

The morning drive to work was almost the same.  Stuck in traffic at the same spots were people can't merge, same truck drivers trying to take all four lanes for themselves.  But today, we had to have that one car that held everybody up, for no reason.  No accident, just slowing everyone down.  I hit the jam early in the commute today, and I should have taken it as a sign.  Finally, I get pass the car that's slowing everybody down, and the silly driver couldn't even see over the wheel!  Grr!  Bad drivers are my number one pet peeve.  (You can tell I learned to drive in a major city)

Then at work, I had nothing to do so I decided to make my usually Tuesday bank runs today.  I get to the bank and I see three tellers open, and One line.  I.  HATE.  That.  If there are three tellers open, there should be three lines.  Now, I know for banks they need you in one line for security reasons, but it's like that anywhere you need to line up.  And it make no sense.  And if you dare to be the one to try and make a new line, everybody stares daggers at you and freaks out.  This is also one of my higher up pet peeves.  Again, grr!

After I get back from the bank, I sit down at my desk and I saw my tank top had a loose thread.  So I did what any natural person would do.  I pulled the string.  And kept pulling.  And pulling.  I tried breaking the string but it wouldn't snap off and by the time I found a pair of scissors, I had ruined the entire bottom half of my favourite tank top.  No grr for this one.  Just a very heavy sigh. 

If my day ended with that, I would have been happy.  But with my luck,  no such thing.  I'm pretty sure this picture says it all.

People who do not shower need to understand personal bubble space.  Just sayin.

Since I've been home, I've been locked up in my room, in my bed, doing nothing but this post to avoid any further run-ins with annoying-ness.  I swear, if this computer breaks...





PS!!! You guys kept telling me to make more pictures.  So I did.  So there.

I Procrastinate

I have a problem.  I am addicted to procrastinating.  Hard core.

It's been this way as long as I can remember.  For homework, work work, or even for stuff that I like to do, I always put it off till the last possible second. 

For example, I have in my note book 5 blogs that I am currently working on.  The oldest one is one I started at the beginning of this month that was actually to be my first blog.  But for some reason, I haven't finished it yet.  I like having some pictures in my posts to "spruce up the place", so I will set aside time to draw.  At first, I make a decent attempt at it but then something shiny flashes and I'm off on a random tangent and I either end up watching YouTube for 6 hours in a row or I draw something completely unrelated to the post.

Here, the picture I was intending to draw was one of a crowded hallway, and it morphed into a spider wearing yellow boots and dancing on a stage.  I can clearly see the correlation between the two. 

I don't think I procrastinate solely on the fact that I'm completely lazy.  I have the worst memory in the world.  At school, we would be assigned something so simple like "read a poem and write your feelings about it" and I would be all geared up to do it when I get home.  As soon as I'm home, I'm reminded of something else I forgot to do so I go off and do that and forget entirely about the homework.  I'll have finished my earlier task, and feel super proud of myself for remembering to do it before it became a bigger task and then draw a blank on what to do next.  I'll usually end up checking my email, draw a completely random picture, go onto YouTube, eat, YouTube again, take the puppy out for a walk, quilt (yes, I do that!), movie, maybe for a change of pace a little more YouTube and then go to bed. 

For some reason, I remember everything I was suppose to do that day but forgot the moment I am almost about to fall asleep.  I then lie there wondering if I should get up and do my homework, but realize that it is now 1 am, and then make plans to do them first thing after work the next day. 
And then I wake up forgetting the plans I just made the night before. 

It's not until the night before or even in the morning that something has to be done that I remember that I haven't done it yet.  And then it's a mad dash to do what I need to.  I must be addicted to the adrenalin rush or something because I never learn.

I need to go buy post it reminder notes..

I. Heart. My. Sister.

I love how random Sister can be at times.  No, this isn't one of those super sappy "let me count thy ways" type posts were all I do is praise her.  But it is one where I show the world just how random she is.

Let me set the scene.  Sister was once again staying over at my house when the parents came over for a quick visit.  Sister and I were on one couch, and the parents were on the other.  Sister left to go get her laptop so I went over and sat by Dad because he was away with work for the past week and I wanted to chat and catch up with him.  We had a nice conversation.  Sister came back and sat across from us with her laptop.  After she did what she needed to do on the computer, she didn't put it away, but stared at it with conviction and was typing away madly.  I could see a mischievous grin on her face, but I just assumed that she was talking to somebody via facebook or something.  Oh boy, was she ever. 

So it gets to that time where the parents are getting ready to leave and we all say our good byes, and Sister and I head back to the basement to finish our movie.  I get to my computer, and I noticed that I had a message on facebook.  A really.  REALLY.  Long message.  From Sister.  So, of course, I thought this was something the Internet needed. So here is what she sent me.  Enjoy, Internet.





just because my computer is here and yours isn't, i'm gonna send you lots and lots and lots of messages
enjoy
cuz this is gonna get fun
I LOVE YOU!!!! ♥♥
please don't hurt me
remember that somewhere in your heart you love me
if i know its possible that i could get hurt, why do i keep sending these?
i must be really excited to get punched or something
NO!!!! PLEASE DON'T!!!
haahahaha
lalalalalalalalalalalla i'm singing a song..... in my head
hahahahahaha this is slightly entertaining
woody's round up... lyrics that i can't remember right now. something about being the rootenous(?) toutenous(?) cowboy in the west..... fail.....
b-b-baboon baboon b-b-baby baboon
dad got sockets
huzzah!
** NARWHALS NARWHALS swimming in the ocean, causing a commotion, cuz they are so awesome. NARWHALS NARWHALS swimming in the ocean really big and really white it beats that polar bear in the fight, its like an underwater unicorn, it has a kick-butt facial horn, it is the jedi of the sea (it stops cthul from eating ye). narwhals, they are narwhals. narwhals (just don't let them touch your balls) narwhals, they are narwhals. narwhals, inventors of the shis-kebab. **
you loved that didn't you
DIDN'T YOU!!!!
hehehehe hey they want to leave, and guess what? Grandma wants to keep talking
surprise surprise
ya.... i'm not at all bored
...
ring ring
(imaginary crystal) hello?
ring ring
(imaginary crystal) h-h-hello?
CHINESE FOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ya. i did that
your jealous





I can't really explain any of this except her brain has snapped.  Like a dry and brittle twig.  But man I still like her :)

I can draw :)

I was bored today.  And my friend asked me to draw her something.  So I did.  And I liked it so much I thought I would share it.



.....Don't judge me.....

UPDATE:

I talked with my friend about posting this picture and she asked if a story went along with it.  I didn't really plan on having a story to go with this, it was just a picture that I drew, but Friend reminded me of a promise I made to her and that gave me a short story idea.  A very short story idea.

This zebra and this giraffe is Friend and mines new family.  Cause I win the lottery and we move to Africa because it is hot and sunny and zebras and giraffes live there.  So I'd like to introduce you to George and Benny. George is the zebra, and Benny is the giraffe.  That is all...

...Again....dont' judge me....

Pain Ninja

I've come to the conclusion that I'm being stalked by the Pain Ninja.  He knows where I am at all times, day or night.  While I sleep, and even when I think I'm safe, he's there.

Today alone, I've had a run in with the Pain Ninja three times.  First, when I was working, I went into the warehouse and tripped on absolutely nothing and twisted my ankle.  He was there.  Second, when again I was working and I was stuffing envelopes, he swooped in with a nasty paper cut.  And then, two hours ago, I was going down my stairs and instead of moving the fence to keep the dog going upstairs and annoy the ever living snot out of Grandpa, I tried to jump it.  And there he was, waiting for me.  I could feel him near by, but that didn't stop me.  I wanted to jump the fence.  And he wanted me to try to jump the fence.  As soon as both feet were in the air, I knew I was screwed.  The Pain Ninja grabbed my sock and snared it onto the fence, causing me to flail in mid air before I landed on my knees on the last step and then roll onto the floor, fence landing on top of me. 

I'm not sure what I did to invoke the full rage of the Pain Ninjas wrath.  Even as a small child I remember minding my own business, not bothering a sing soul, and he would show up, band aids in tow. 

Sometimes its easily to tell when he's lurking around.  I can see him behind a bush or car, just waiting for the most opportune moment.  Sometimes I've even been able to avoid him or deflect his attack onto someone else.  Example, once Sister and I were playing with our then brand new puppy. Puppy was small and fluffy, but get her going, and she turns into a ferocious beast.  Puppy was in a particularly ferocious mood and was biting hard when Sister and I were playing with her. Puppy lunged to bite me on my face.  For some reason, I became distracted and turned my head just in time for puppy to fly past me and bite Sister on the face instead.  Pain Ninja wasn't going to get me that time.

Other times, Pain Ninja would turn my own family against me in his quest for misery.  Example, family and I had just got back from a long day at the lake and we were putting our boat away into the garage.  Both of the wheel chucks (wedges to put under tires so they wont roll) were on the side Brother was on.  I asked him if he could pass me a wheel chuck, but the Pain Ninja had convinced him to instead throw the wheel chuck as hard as he could straight at my face.  This time, the Pain Ninja succeeded in his quest.  I had to get four stitches for his plot.

Needless to say, I'm scared of Pain Ninja.  And you should be too.  Cause he will find you...

Toiletts. I'm scared of them.

This may seem like something no grown woman, or man, should be afraid of, but I have two TV hosts to thank for this ridiculous fear.  The Myth Busters.

No.  Seriously.  Because of them, I now have an irrational fear of the nastiness that comes from these modern life nessiary tools.

I never used to be afraid of toilets.  I would use them like any normal person, without a care in the world.  Until the Myth Busters decided to test to see if there is a correlation between the distance of your tooth brush to the toilet and the amount of air born fecile matter that could land on said tooth brush.  I watched that episode in horror as they tested distance after distance and even put the tooth brush in another room under a jar and the tooth brush STILL came out with traces of invisible flying dung on them.  Why would they show you this??  Are they trying to make people paranoid?  Cause they have succeed.  How could I brush my teeth ever again?  I would literally have to buy a bazillion new brushes just so I could use a new one every time and not worry about what I'm rubbing into my gums and tongue.  Kay not a bazillion, but you get my drift.

I think I should clarify a little bit.  I'm not "afraid" afraid of the toilet, so long as it has a lid I can put down before I flush and send nasty into the air.  I have some how talked my self into believing that if the lid is down, none of the newly deposited body waste would find it's way onto my tooth brush.  Ever since that episode, EVERY TIME I use the the washroom and there is a lid, that sucker goes down.  And if people are at my house and they do NOT put the lid down, there is HELL.  TO.  PAY.

If I have the misfortune of having to use the facilities and the toilet does not have a lid, I usually hold it.  My toothbrush is no where near this lidless monstrosity, but I just know that when I flush that some how it will find its way to my washroom and land ever so delicately on my tooth brush.  But if the need is dire, then a grown woman has to do what a grown woman has to do.  Stand as far away from the toilet as possible, flush, and run away.  Thanks to the Myth Busters, I carry an unhealthy amount of antibacterial soap AND spray with me to public outings.

The Closest I’ve Come to Giving my Mom a Heart Attack.

My father has to travel a lot with his job. Sometimes he’ll be gone for weeks at a time. Although he’s gone a lot, he’s also one of the greatest dads in the world.

Many years ago (I think I was about 10?), Dad had to go to San Francisco for about 3 weeks for a big business meeting. It was during the summer time, so he had arranged for the whole family to go down with him. It was flipping sweet! Dad had to fly down with his company, so the rest of Family had to minivan it down. It took us two days to get to San Francisco. Brother and I fought for the front seat pretty much the whole way.

I remember the first day we got there, Dad took us to the “Full House” house, which turned out to be a buzz kill cause Uncle Joey wasn’t going to pop out anything soon. We also went to all the “George of the Jungle” sites too. Pretty sure Dad could moon light as a guide to the stars homes when he retires.
After about a week, Mom decided to take us kid to Six Flags. Six Flags!! The god of all amusement parks!....Before the old dancing man on the bus killed it for everyone.

It was beautiful. Rides as far as the eye can see, a killer whale and dolphin show, games full of the stuff typed toys that break within three days, every type of candy stands you could imagine, and, the greatest of them all, a real. Live. BATMAN SHOW! That’s right. I got to see Batman and Robin kick villain butt. Twice. You can’t just see it once. It was too magical.

After the second showing, Brother became ill from to much candy and spinning rides and Mom was trying to console him. We sat down on a curb to give him a little rest. But I didn’t want to just sit and wait for Brother to feel better. There were rides to go on, games to play, RIDES TO GO ON! Sister and I were sitting with Brother while Mom went to go get some ginger-ale for him when we spotted it.

It was the most beautiful train we had ever seen. It was sky blue with a big black bell on its engine. The cars were big with massive cushions. The conductor wore his stripped overalls like a pro. We HAD to go on this train.

Mom had just returned with Brothers drink when I asked her if we could go on the train. Mom said no cause Brother needed to relax for a few moments. Sister and I begged to go on the ride. I told Mom that I was old enough to take care of Sister and that we would go straight on the ride and come straight back and it wouldn’t take very long and I would not talk to strangers and I would clean every room in the house so long as I went on that train. Mom was busy checking Brothers forehead and vital signs and agreed to lets us go on the ride.

Sister and I darted for the train. The line was short so we got on right away. We sat right at the front, right behind the conductor. As soon as the last passenger boarded, we were off. We were racing around the park in all our 15 k/hr glory. The track lead us all over the park, through the gardens and behind the animal exhibits. It. Was. Amazing.

At one point, I remember thinking that the ride was taking a lot longer than I had previously thought. But then again, the longer the train ride, the better. Then, the train stopped. Sister and I got out, thinking the ride was over. I looked around for Mom and Brother, but I couldn’t see them. In fact, I didn’t remember this part of the park. Then, it clicked. We were on the other side of the massive amusment park. As far as possible from where we boarded the train. Crap. I took the “protect Sister” part to heart, grabbed her hand and marched back to the train. Just as we were about to climb back into our seats, the line attendant caught me and told me to get to the back of the line. I tried very politely to inform him that we needed to get back on the train so it can take us back to where we started. I didn’t like him much. Not looking very amused, the attendant repeated his “back of the line” motto, pointing to the longest line in the park. The train line. Liking the attendant less and less, I dragged Sister to the back of the line and waited my turn, scowling at the attendant whenever he wasn’t looking.

Finally, the line had slimmed down enough for us to get on the next rain. We were stuck in the middle, the worst part of the train. I blamed the attendant fully for this. I was in such a foul mood I couldn’t enjoy the ride back.

When we had finally got back to our original spot, sister and I climbed out of the train and began walking back to Brother and Mom. The crowd in the park seemed to have thickened while we were gone on the ride. We had trouble fighting out way back to the meeting spot. I remember this next part vividly.

Brother was still sitting on the curb, looking greener than before we left, but Mom was not with him. I looked around the crowd, and then all of a sudden I saw Mom barreling towards sister and I, face red and eyes blinded with tears. Mom scoped us up and carried us towards Brother. I have never been hugged to tightly before in my life. I was confused. Why was Mom crying? Why was she squeezing my eyes out? Sister was the brave one. She asked why Mom was crying.

Sister: Why are you crying Mommy?

Mom: I thought you were stolen! Don’t ever do that again!

Me: Do what? What do you mean stolen?

Mom: Why didn’t you go on the balloons?

Me: (even more confused) The what?

Mom: The balloons! The balloon ride! The one you told me you were going on!

I looked over to where she was pointing. The ride she was talking about was a Ferris wheel style ride with hot air balloon shaped seats, and was right next to the train ride. Apparently, Mom thought she heard Sister and I say balloon ride rather than train ride. When she looked over to see if we were still in line, and didn’t see us, she assumes we were on the ride. Then when we didn’t get off when it was over, Mom did the only natural thing and FREAKED. And the train ride taking so long to get to the other side of the park, and then us having to wait for the train to leave and come back and then take us back again didn’t help much. Add on one sick child who she couldn’t leave to find us and the park staff refusing to shut the park down to stop a potential child napper from leaving, I’m surprised she didn’t implode.

To this day Sister and I insist we said train, not balloon. Needless to say, we had a beeper sewn into our clothes at every other amusement park outings after that.


UPDATE :
I read this post to Mom. She told me I had to clarify the time line a little bit. Sister and I were gone for 2 hours before we came back. Holy...

Blue Moment

I've decided that I need to clarify my blogs name.  The name comes from an inside joke between Sister and I.  Sister will forever be named Sister, saying as she's still a minor in....all countries.  And I sort of like her.  So I'll try to at least protect her identity whilst I throw mine to the way side.  Anyways.  Sister and I have many inside jokes that we're pretty sure makes the rest of the family pretty darn jealous.  As they should be.  Cause we're awesome.

Because every bird must leave the family nest at some point in their lives, I moved out of my childhood home.  Out of my parents house of over 16 years.  And right into..... my grandparents basement!  Not even 15 minutes from my old room.  Now, before you start judging me and thinking I'm a lazy mooch (half true), family health issues and moral responsibility is what swayed me to move in with the grand rentals.  That, and I get a queen sized bed!  And pretty much the whole basement to my self.  It's a pretty sweet set up.

One evening, Sister came over to "my house" to spend the night.  I can't recall why exactly she came over, I probably bribed her, it happens.  We did the usual pre-bed routine and stuff.  Now, because I'm "always plugged in" according to my parents, I have this thing were I need to fall sleep with some sort of background noise going on, be it a TV show, movie, music or what have you.  That night, Sister and I had agreed that Finding Nemo would be the noise of choice.  Also, I HAVE to play a game on my iPod before I fall asleep.  I can not possibly give my brain a rest before forcing it to shut down for a few hours.  So there we were, lying in bed with me playing minesweeper and Sister reading a book (this kid reads a TON of books. Not even joking), and Finding Nemo playing on the TV.  We were just at the part were Nemo's dad's fishy wife, or Nemo's mom, or even more simpler, Coral, was being eaten by the big scary fish.  Not even thinking, or realizing that I was doing it, I just started chanting "RAWR! I'm a scary fish!" over and over in an old crotchety mans voice. 

I kept on saying this for 5 minutes according to Sister before I got that funny feeling of being watched and judged at the same time.  You know the feeling.  I paused my game and looked over to see Sister looking at me in utter bewilderment, and yet, not surprised.  Being forced to live with me has numbed her to any surprises.  Which kind of sucks.

It took me a while to realize why she was staring at me, and once it clicked in my head, I burst out laughing only to pause to repeat my chant in an even worse old crotchety mans voice.  Sister just sighed, turned back to her book and muttered, "blue moment".  This was a strange thing to say, even for this scenario. I stopped my hyena cackle and asked if I had heard her right.  She confirmed that she did indeed say blue moment.  The look on my face must have scream "duuuurrr" cause Sister started to laugh at me.  She explained that in this book she was reading, the characters see emotions and feelings in colour.  So apparently awkward was to be translated as blue. 

I don't remember much afterwards besides assigning other colours to other situations and emotions. I remember protesting blue to being assigned to awkward cause I like blue and blue should be paired with something awesome and the green should be stuck with awkward.  Sister pointed out to me that I liked green also, and that by my logic green shouldn't be paired with awkward either. She also pointed out the we put red with love because it was a typical correlation, and that the other colours shouldn't be typical in their assignments. Touché Sister, touché.

So that's how an awkward situation turned into a blue moment....What a horrible way to end a story.

This is a blue ending...

New blog. WOAH!!

Oh hey!  Welcome to my blog! ......Yea.  Pretty sure the world needed another person to blog about their day and life stories.  Makes sense, right?

I've thought about making a blog for a while now, even though I may or may not used to make fun of those who did.  Oops?  The turning point might have been the fact that I like to talk a lot, and this is just another outlet for me to say more stuff. Say more stuff?  And apparently do it without a thought towards grammar. Score!

Writing this first post has already taught me a few things about blog posting.

   1) Have an idea.  And in my case, jot it down  I tend to forget things easily.  Very easily.  Like to the point where I had an awesome idea for my first post, sat down, turned on the iTunes for some tunes, and literally forgot everything I was going to write.

   2) Pee first.  This may sound like a no brain-er, but it's a step all beginners need to be aware of.  OR, again, this is just something I need to be aware of (....I'm sensing a pattern already).

   3) Eliminate ALL distractions.  I started this post at 10:13 pm. It is now 11:24 pm.  And it`s not even a long blog.  Perhaps I should have turned off the YouTube.

Welp. I think thats it....I promise to plan my next one out a bit better.