Toiletts. I'm scared of them.

This may seem like something no grown woman, or man, should be afraid of, but I have two TV hosts to thank for this ridiculous fear.  The Myth Busters.

No.  Seriously.  Because of them, I now have an irrational fear of the nastiness that comes from these modern life nessiary tools.

I never used to be afraid of toilets.  I would use them like any normal person, without a care in the world.  Until the Myth Busters decided to test to see if there is a correlation between the distance of your tooth brush to the toilet and the amount of air born fecile matter that could land on said tooth brush.  I watched that episode in horror as they tested distance after distance and even put the tooth brush in another room under a jar and the tooth brush STILL came out with traces of invisible flying dung on them.  Why would they show you this??  Are they trying to make people paranoid?  Cause they have succeed.  How could I brush my teeth ever again?  I would literally have to buy a bazillion new brushes just so I could use a new one every time and not worry about what I'm rubbing into my gums and tongue.  Kay not a bazillion, but you get my drift.

I think I should clarify a little bit.  I'm not "afraid" afraid of the toilet, so long as it has a lid I can put down before I flush and send nasty into the air.  I have some how talked my self into believing that if the lid is down, none of the newly deposited body waste would find it's way onto my tooth brush.  Ever since that episode, EVERY TIME I use the the washroom and there is a lid, that sucker goes down.  And if people are at my house and they do NOT put the lid down, there is HELL.  TO.  PAY.

If I have the misfortune of having to use the facilities and the toilet does not have a lid, I usually hold it.  My toothbrush is no where near this lidless monstrosity, but I just know that when I flush that some how it will find its way to my washroom and land ever so delicately on my tooth brush.  But if the need is dire, then a grown woman has to do what a grown woman has to do.  Stand as far away from the toilet as possible, flush, and run away.  Thanks to the Myth Busters, I carry an unhealthy amount of antibacterial soap AND spray with me to public outings.